Titus 1:5-9 The reason I left you in Crete was that you might straighten out what was left unfinished and appoint elders in every town, as I directed you. 6 An elder must be blameless, the husband of but one wife, a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient. 7 Since an overseer is entrusted with God’s work, he must be blameless—not overbearing, not quick-tempered, not given to drunkenness, not violent, not pursuing dishonest gain. 8 Rather he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined. 9 He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it.

It has always annoyed me that some congregations choose "husband of one wife" as the focus of this passage of God’s word. The word "blameless" is far and away more important. There are precious few men you can call "blameless". Most men serving as deacons are afflicted with being human. Sometimes men are elected who are greedy, others businessmen barely in the law and still others who have committed adultery. Jesus said that a man who looks upon a woman with lust commits adultery. That was a stoning offense and today it is broken trust. The criteria for deacons is very high and "blameless" should not be overlooked.

The church is to seek out the best people. That surely means "blameless". One year at a church could not find a man to put forth as deacon who was not divorced or single. the pastor suggested to the church that a constitutional change be made to reduce the number of deacons. If none are qualified, none should be put forth.

If a church would be more concerned with "blameless" than "one wife" they could have a better group of deacons. A "blameless" man would be good to his family, support his church (no fishing, hunting, working or going to the beach during church hours), tithe and be swift to preach the Gospel. And, a blameless man would not be divorced and he would not be a polygamist. The standard for deacons is far higher than just having one wife or not being divorced. The highest of standards should be the ones found in the following verse.

Acts 6:3 Wherefore, brethren, look ye out among you seven men of honest report, full of the Holy Ghost and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business.

The church holds the responsibility for choosing deacons. They should apply all the requirements and not be dogmatic and hold only to one to the exclusion of the other standards.

Now the hard part of all this is, "if a man has confessed his sin to the church and sought forgiveness of the church and says that He is forgiven of the Lord" then does the forgiveness of sin – as far as the east is from the west – apply to service in the church? Do we limit the ability of God to forgive and cleanse?

The slope is slippery. That is why it should never be in one man’s hand to rule over the church. A pastor who dictates to the church is a man to be wary of. An Elder is characterized as being one of wisdom. An overseer is also a man of wisdom and has a commitment unto His Lord that is all encompassing. These are the one’s fed to the lions.

There are two things a church will have to weigh. (1) Is choosing deacons to be done as a popularity contest that overlooks the "blameless" and the "full of the Holy Spirit" standards. (2) Will the church accept confession and repentance as forgiveness of God that will cancel out former sin (even divorce). How often should I forgive my brother? Seven times seven? No, seventy times seventy. Or as often as you desire God forgive you.

Rather than argue "husband of one wife" a church would do well do consider if the selection and voting on a person as deacon will disrupt the congregation. There are many passages that instruct the church to avoid dissention, back-biting and the like. The church is to be at peace that it may worship, praise and love among one another. Disrupting the church for any reason is filled with peril.